The first workout after a bad weekend is the worst

Surely I’m not the only one that veers off the path of good sense on the weekend.  Well, this past weekend was a long one, thank you Dr. King, and I veered quite a ways off the path.  I ate pizza with cheese and biscuits slathered in butter from Hardees **gasp** and egg drop soup twice and lots of sugar and junk.  It sounds stupid when I list it all out because none of this sounds good enough to justify the grogginess and lethargy I feel today.  (Those biscuits hit the spot Monday morning though.)

It’s on weekends like these that I wish I was a true, animal-loving vegan.  If my choices were motivated by more a noble principle than weight management, I’d be better at keeping them.  But, try as I might, I just can’t convince myself that eating eggs, butter and milk is cruel to animals.  I know people disagree and I see their point, but I just can’t get on board.

Some of you may be reading and noticing that I cheated on veganism and became vegetarian.  That shouldn’t be so bad, right?  It shouldn’t, but for me it is.  Dairy products don’t like me.  My body, in retribution, doesn’t like them either.  Milk and milk products are my worst enemy, deceptively innocuous but cruel.  No matter how hard I try to pretend that milk products aren’t bad for me, my body knows that I’m not a baby cow and have no good reason to be eating like one.

My body knows best--this is not me. http://www.macrobiotic.org/msmilk.html

In the past, I would have beat myself up pretty bad for a weekend of mindless, senseless eating.  I would have reminded myself over and over of my failures and my fat and my ugliness.  But not now.  I went back to my pre-binge schedule and will give my body a few days to recover and remember.  The Pilates class today was punishment enough.  My body must have believed that if I ate 5 slices of pizza over the course of 48 hours I had no intention of ever working out again because today’s class came as a shocking surprise to half my muscles.  My instructor called out moves and my abs responded, yeah right, make me.   I was amazed that my body could forget so quickly.  Didn’t it consider that the lazy, indulgent weekend was going to end eventually like all the others?  Apparently not.  Well, my brain is going to have to take back control then because it remembers.

Today is my day to regroup and rediscover my vegan ways.  I did one thing right already—I worked out even when I didn’t feel like it.  All it takes now is for me to take a few more steps in the right direction and I will have recovered from my cheese fest.

I’m going to reread The China Study or one of Dr. Weil’s books or Skinny Bitch.

If you haven't read this, you'd like it.

Any of those books is likely to get my head on straight again and nudge out my old ways of thinking like they have before.  Then, I’m going to cook beans.  Everything is right with the world when I’m eating beans.  I’ll be full, vegan and well-nourished.  After my bean dinner, I’m going to remember something that I like to do that doesn’t involve feeding my face, and I’m going to do it.  (I see shopping in my future.)  Later tonight, I’ll go to bed early, clean and dressed in something pretty, and let my body keep sorting through the sludge until it gets happy again.

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4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Sarah on January 18, 2012 at 1:20 am

    You should be so proud of yourself for working out after all of that! The motivation to do that after a weekend of indulging would have been long gone for me. I’m impressed and proud of you!

    Love the Skinny Bitch book, it’s great. And makes a lot of sense to me.

    Great post!

    Reply

    • Then you must not be eating all that good food you’re cooking. If you were, you’d know you have to fight back or you’ll be ruined.

      Picking up my copy of Mindy Kaling’s book today…

      Reply

  2. Ah, the weekend. How does that sneak up on us as it does.

    Reply

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